Tamara Diaghilev, Palm Reading for Gloria , San Francisco, 6 May 1981

[Start of Recording] Gloria Anzaldúa: You want me to take off my rings?
Tamara Diaghilev: No. Okay—have you ever had your palm read?
GA: Uh, yes—once.
TD: Are you right-handed or left-handed?
GA: I'm right-handed, but I was ambidextrous when I was little.
TD: Okay. I always read both hands.
GA: [inaudible]
[long pause]

TD: What I want to say is you have real, real--very, very interesting palms, first of all [GA laughs], because of many reasons. One, is that you came into this lifetime with pretty heavy [inaudible]--pretty heavy karma in this lifetime and you've already totally taken care of it.
GA: Totally?
TD: Yep. You've worked off what you had to work off and I'll tell you why. Uh, you see the difference in the two palms?
GA: mmhmm
TD: This one be much more complicated than this one. This one you're really clearing up. You're really taking charge of your life in this lifetime. You're really, really clearing up--just look at the difference. The clarity of this palm. Compared to this. Like this is a heavy palm on that level. In other words, much more stuff to work out. You conscioulsy made the decision of handling life in this lifetime. Not being a child of fate. This is just wonderful. I'd love to take your palm prints [GA laughs] because that's so vividly illustrated, you know? [Inaudible] And you're greatest accomplishement in this lifetime by the way is really going to, uh, is really going to be what I call a "creatress of realities." Because you really are not a child of fate. You barely have a fate line in this hand. Which is very, very good you see.
GA: mmhmm
TD: But even here, you're already had chosen when you came in--I wouldn't be surprised if this might be your last incarnation [inaudible].
GA: [laughs] Okay
TD: Or one of the--If its not your last, you don't have too many to go through anymore. You might want to check [inaudible]. There's not much-

Diaghilev discusses Anzaldúa's health, describing better health in this lifetime, compared to past incarnations. Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa she was born into family dependency and has chosen to become an "independent spirit," making a conscious effort to disengage from family to pursue her own goals.

TD: Okay! You defintely are a writer. You have two writer's loops in your hand.
GA: Oh, really? Where?
TD: See these finger prints here?
GA: uh huh
TD: These are writer's loops. So one one level and since you have two of them--
GA: [laughs]
TD: Okay so do you know anything about palmistry first of all?
GA: Very little.
TD: Do you know the mounds?

Demonstrating on Anzaldúa's hand, Diaghilev points out the the location of each mound and its significance: Jupiter (public life), Saturn (inner life), Apollo (creativity), Mercury (communication), Lunar (inspiration and love of beauty), Venus (passion and love), Positive and Negative Mars (energetic balance). Diaghilev says Anzaldúa's hands show that she used to have a temper. Anzaldúa laughs and says she still does. Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa she has been better equipped balance her temper as she has cleared her throat and heart chakras. Diaghilev goes on to describe the lines of the hand: Life Line (physical life and health), Head Line (career and intellect), and Love Line/Heart Line (love).

TD: Then, here you have a Line of Apollo--your Sun Line--and you were born with tremendous talents. However, what I want to say is that, here, like your--this is like your Talent Line, your Sun Line--it's the most powerful up here. That means that once you're really gonna be successful, it's just gonna go straight ahead. And I'll show you the difference in my hands. Mine stops at the head, and then it continues up here.
GA: But it's interrupted right there?
TD: But--it's interrupted and I'll tell you why. Because, although on some level I always wanted to be an artist, you know? I never--I always limited my creativity. I never was quite good enough, you know? I really wanted to be a painter, but I became an art historian and an archaeologist because I said, "Well, I'm not talented enough."
GA: But your creativity is in being psychic.
TD: Oh it's in teaching, sure. But I didn't know this until I limited my creativity with my head.
GA: Ahh, sí. They're very different from mine.
TD: Yeah, yeah.

GA: And what's this? Empowerment?
TD: That's my line of fate.
GA: Of fate.
TD: And then here is my mystic cross. That is my work as a psychic. Usually people who are professional psychics have this cross [inaudible].
GA: I don't have [inaudible]
TD: [inaudible] Yeah, you have it in this hand. You see? Yeah, you have it in this hand. Yeah. But you could use it [inaudible]. Anytime the four corners here connect to the two lines, that means you have professional qualities.
GA: [inaudible]
TD: But it's not in this one. No, but in other words you were born with this ability.
GA: mmh
TD: Now, um, it is in this one, it's just not as prominent. See?
[sound of vehicle engine in background]
GA: See this corner doesn't touch.
TD: Yeah. So what that means is you'll always be psychic. you'll always use that psychic ability, but you're probably gonna use it more for the expression of writing, see? Than become professional psychic. You know-in other words you're gonna use it--especially here, it's like, its connected and kind of goes up. There's that connection with your Sun line. You can see it goes like this..

Title: "Poetry and Magick: A Practicum for Developing Literary and Psychic Stills,", undated | Location: Box: 63 | Folder: 3

GA: Okay, what--this line is the fate line? No--the power? What--
TD: Yeah. No-Okay here you have--this is your line of Mercury. That's your line of communication. Not everybody has this line. This line is like your special talent. And out of your communication ability comes your fate line. So your fate is really--okay, it's your destiny to be a communicator-
GA: To communicate.
TD: Yes, yeah. Yeah. Okay, now here--your writer's loops are--on this level it's between Mercury and Apollo. That means you can use your creativity and writing to make money with it. Another level--there's another part of your writing which is much more philosophical. And that might not sell as well, you see. But you have both and you'll be published in both. On both levels you're gonna be published. And you're very philosophical type.
GA: I'm working on a book called El Libro de la Vida. The Book of Life, and its like that.
TD: Ohh, okay, okay, yeah. And it will also sell but its not gonna be like--that book is only gonna be like for the special people, you know. And then, the other ability you have to put something out in the universe is gonna be a big seller. Two--okay, there are two ways you're gonna write, right? It's not that there are two ways you're gonna write, but two different products, in other words. One is gonna be a big seller, gonna make big money with it. The other one may not make as much money but it's gonna be--that's gonna touch people's hearts.
GA: It's like this one is gonna have a wide audience, and this one is gonna have a kind of limited audience.
TD: Yeah, yeah.
Anzaldúa and Diaghilev continue discussing her potential literary success.

TD: Now-I would like to tell you that you're definitely gonna come out, lady.
[both laughing]
TD: It's in your hand. That's this line--
GA: Well I'm out, but I'm not out.
TD: I know, that's what I mean, you know-there's no way that you're not gonna complete this.
GA: uh huh
TD: In other words if you ever have a doubt, just look at your hand.
GA: Where is it?
TD: It's gonna happen [inaudible]
GA: Where is it in my hand?
TD: [inaudible] [sound of church bell striking in background]
[Tape stops and recording begins again] [church bells ringing in the background]
Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa about three significant relationships in her future, with one very important person entering her life in her early 40s. Anzaldúa sounds excited by this.
[traffic sounds in the background]
GA: Does lesbian's hands differ from straight hands?
TD: Yes, I'll show you.
Diaghilev shows Anzaldúa where her hands indicate that she is a lesbian. Diaghilev then shows her own hand to Anzaldúa for comparison. Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa that she herself was "bisexual for a long time."

Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa she will settle on another continent to finish out her life. Anzaldúa is excited to hear that she will get to enjoy many long trips. Diaghilev instructs Anzaldúa not to worry about being able to afford travel because it will come to her.

TD: Oh, look at all these heal--these are all healing lines. You're really a healer. You really can heal. Part of your work, of course is also to heal [inaudible] and heal women, you know? On another level than maybe the physical healing. Heal women through raising their consciousness level, you know?

Title: Psychology/Metaphysics/Health | Box: 166

GA: Sí. I was told that before. That my task was to intercede to the Earth on behalf of its children of the Earth.
TD: Yeah yeah. Definitely, I--these are incredible healing lines. You're really a healer. Part of your work is that of a healer. And you really have just, like you--you know, you were born with this ability. Yeah.
GA: I have to do more, though.
TD: No. Whatever you do, do it from healing space. When you give your workshops, obviously, you're healing. You're also being healed while you do your workshops. Don't--you know what I mean?

Title: Gigs and Teaching, 1967-2002 | Box: 226

GA: S-- [she begins to say sí but hesitates]
TD: You're healing them from writing blocks, your writer's blocks. You're really healing them by, like, the processes you do. They're really healing processes at the same time. And whatever you do, you know, whatever your daily mantra or mandala is, you know--your daily work--whatever you do, part of it is you're also healing [inaudible].
GA: Even though I'm not conscious of it?

Diaghilev instructs Anzaldúa on developing her consciousness around the healing aspects of her work; to make an affirmation in the morning before she gives a workshop or speech. Diaghilev validates other forms of healing, such as conversation and cooking. Diaghilev encourages Anzaldúa to engage intent to heal in the same way she would engage her knowledge before speaking publicly. Insists that her teaching work is healing work.
Diaghilev details how Anzaldúa should move energy through her chakras. There's a cat meowing in the background. Anzaldúa says this pratice will be helpful in her workshops. Diaghilev mentions she can do this work by herself or she can engage her audience to collectively build the energy in the space and for the event, as a collective raising of consciousness.

Title: Inner Temple: Tarama Diagilev, 4 Mayo 81, SFICA / Inner Sanctuary cont'd; Blossoming Meditation, 1981 | Box: 158 | Item 2** | Extent: [mp3 #177]

TD: Okay. So. Now-this is so--I'm really interest--[Anzaldúa laughs] In this lifetime also--you are really in this lifetime, you have really chosen to be your teacher. Your own teacher, you know? Because, although when you came into this life you could easily be influenced by people as a child or so.
GA: I've learned almost everything from books and from myself. And its only recently like with you that I've started learning from other people.
Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa she was probably a very obedient child. Anzaldúa says she would feign obedience, but would go on to do what she wanted. Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa this obedience influenced her to become independent and to be her own teacher.

Diaghilev says there is a lot of romance in her life, and that her life will be very eventful. Anzaldúa says she's "never met a boring day," although she sometimes wishes "the roller coaster would stop."

[long pause; rumbling traffic sounds in the background]
Diaghilev and Anzaldúa discuss a volatile relationship in Anzaldúa's life around the age of 25. Diaghilev shows Anzaldúa where the lines on her hand indicate this relationship, and compares to her own hand. There is a long pause, and Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa she has the strongest healing lines she's seen in a long time.
There is another long pause. Diaghilev circles back to the idea that Anzaldúa will settle on another continent around age 50. Anzaldúa remarks, "I'll have my villa in Italy!" and laughs. Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa she will live until her late 70s to early 80s.

GA: That's good. I don't want to die too young.
Diaghilev shows Anzaldúa on her own hand, where her life line breaks, indicating a near-death experience.
GA: I died--I've come close to death several times I don't know if it shows here.

Title: "Courting Death,", 1976, 1979 | Location: Box: 85 | Folder: 28

Diaghilev says that life lines usually mend. Diaghilev continues showing Anzaldúa her hand.

Diaghilev says Anzaldúa has "real clear, real simple lines" indicating she's actively worked toward simplifying her life. There are still "complications" (many small lines) in Anzaldúa's hands, but overall Anzaldúa's hands are hyper-legible and offer a clear picture.

TD: Do you have any questions?
GA: What does this--My hands are very fleshy and I've looked at other people's hands and other people's hands are like flat. And mine are like very padded.
TD: That's your sense--that's your creativity. Padded fingertips are very creative fingertips. The more padded they are, the more sensitive, and the more creative you are. But at the same time you have the ability to be practical with your creativity.
GA: Oh yeah?

Diaghilev says that her fingertips are not cone shaped which would show impracticality. She can write, and will be published. There is unleashed passion in her. Diaghilev quickly looks over the mounds on Anzaldúa's hands. Diaghilev asks her sign; she responds she is a Libra/Virgo cusp, born on September 29. Diaghilev says there is quite a bit of Earth energy in her fleshy palms as well.

Title: Natal chart, Gloria Anzaldúa and Chela Sandoval | Location: Box: 5 | Folder: 11

GA: What about fire? Somebody told me I had fire hands.
TD: Yeah, partially.
GA: Partial?
TD: mmhmm

Anzaldúa asks why her fingers are crooked. Diaghilev says they indicate Anzaldúa will have a strong public life, in front of large groups. They show strength, power, and extroversion. She is well-equipped to handle the public. Diaghilev says that crooked fingers also indicate great attention to detail. Anzaldúa laughs and says she's always thought she lacked attention to detail.

TD: I mean, I have a feeling you're really a stickler when you edit your work and things like this, you know?
GA: I go over every word.
TD: Yeah. Yeah.
GA: Every word.

Title: "The Art of Self-Editing: Re-reading, Re-vision, Re-writing," 1985 | Location: Box: 57 | Folder: 5

Diaghilev says Anzaldúa is a very open person, but is also becoming more and more open. Anzaldúa says she was a very shy child and would often hide behind her mother. Diaghilev says Anzaldúa will get a lot of attention and be able to handle the public well.
[Car horns and traffic sounds in the background]

GA: I love being before crowds and I love being on television--I was on television--and I love being on radio.

Title: Bickford, Susan. "In the Presence of Other: Arendt and Anzaldúa on the Paradox of Public Appearance," Feminist Interpretations of Hannah Arendt (University Park: Penn State, 1995) | Location: Box: 116 | Folder: 6

TD: Yeah and you have a talent for it. You have chosen this talent for it. This is fabulous. This is really good. Yeah. That's fantastic.
GA: So I'm really gonna have a public life, huh?
TD: mmhmm
GA: I better have my sanctuary.

Diaghilev instructs Anzaldúa on how to protect and balance her energy when she is dealing with the public in order to not drain herself. Diaghilev encourages Anzaldúa to bring her spirit guides with her when she engages with the public.

TD: Do you have master guide?
GA: Well this far it's that woman.
TD: That woman. Yes, that--that's her.
GA: But also the hermit that I told you about.
TD: Yeah. Yeah.
GA: I think he's gonna come.

Diaghilev suggests having her guides with her whenever she speaks in public. Diaghilev tells Anzaldúa how she connects with her own master guide, a Mayan priestess, when speaking in front of audiences. Anzaldúa asks if Diaghilev's guide was an iteration of herself in a past life. She responds that her main spirit guide was her teacher in her past life. Diaghilev was also a "Sybil" type in Babylon.
Anzaldúa says she is writing a poem about Lady Babylon/Scarlet Woman. Anzaldúa asks if Diaghilev does her energy work in seclusion. Diaghilev says no, she does it before she speaks to crowds and with her classes, before several thousand people at a time. It has helped her maintain her power, because "I was more than just me." Diaghilev advises Anzaldúa to go into her past lives and be the strongest versions of her past selves.

Title: "Lady Babylon,", 1978-1983 | Location: Box: 87 | Folder: 3

GA: See, well, it's only since the last--since the time you taught us to go into our archives I've been doing it and so I wanna keep doing that.
TD: mmhmm yeah. And I know you've been a teacher before, you know. And so sometimes it's really hard. I have to take on that valence and speak from that space as a teacher. Oh! a lot of interesting information comes through that way. Or speak through your teacher, like the indian woman. That's sometimes how I speak. Aramayo [?]
GA: She's been coming through in Spanish lately [laughs]
TD: Far out! Tape record it. Record it. Be suprprised at your voice eventually, you know? Go in trance and record it whatever she wants to say, say it, you know? [pause] Okay!

Title: S-T [various], 1982-1996 | Location: Box: 25 | Folder: 7

[Tape stops]